If you make a big deal about it you'll just draw more attention to it

Sometimes makeing a big deal about something is the wrong way to handle it. An example, I do a podcast with my wife which can be found at www.candidradio.com On our show yesterday, I mentiond a friend of mine had recently been divorced and I did't find out about it until several months after it happend because I did not get the email. I mentiond my friends first name. Not the last name just the first. My wife then makes a big deal about how mad she's going to be if she finds out I said her first name. First, most people probably did not even notice I did it until she make a big deal out of it for five minutes. Drawing more atention to it. If she had not brought it up most people would not have noticed I even said a name. Second, For all the listeners know I could have been useing a made up name. Now of course sence my wife had to make a big deal out of it it was noticed. Sometims if you hear something you don't like or agree with the best thing to do is MOVE ON. Third, I think I know what kinds of things offend my friends. For anyone to assume they know my friends better than me is just plain stupid. My wife goes, "Why don't you ask her if she'd be offended." Then I get a, "That's what I thought." after a second of silence. Not sure what she meant by that. The reason I did not answer is becuse I don't need to ask my friends what offends them, I already know. If you've known someone for a long time and don't know what offends them that's pretty sad. I figue if this friend was botherd by it this friend will let us know. My wifes assumtion that she'll be offended just brought more attention to the name. Not sure how my wife knows this person will be offended by someone saying her first name. Does she have a crysal ball? Again, if she had just ignored it and moved on no one would have noticed. Sometimes the best way to handle a mistake, assuming oue was made is just to ignroe it and move on. Sometimes people have a hard time undersanding such a simple concept. While some mistakes are worth mentioning, some like ths one are not. If a name slips out on accident just move on or if you're really worried about it, edit it out. Makes me wonder how concernd she really was sence she did not edit it. If you're that against mentioning someones first name then edit it out instead of arguing about it for ten minutes. So sence she did not edit it I don't think she was that worried about offending someone. Funny also how she was offended by me mentioning this friends name but said nothing when I said the name of my brother in law who had poison ivy on his penis. A little inconsistant if you ask me. If you're going to worry about offended one person by nameing their first name then you'd better worry about all people being offended by saying their first names. You don't get to pick and chose. You're either worried about them all or none. You either say first names of all people you are talkikng about or you don't use any. And if someone accidentlay drops a first name just ignore it and move on. If it was accidental there is no need to bring more attention uneeded attention.